This month has certainly been an adventure. In fact, I think it may have been a different sort of adventure than I originally intended. I think the most difficult thing for me were the limitations. I think it's certainly in my nature to completely and desperately desire more than anything else in the whole wide world anything I can't have. (That statement was dramatic to adequately express my fervor.) So, in many ways it was hard for me to stick with the Blues or the Yellow or the Crayons. I've already written about the struggle with the daily exercise. I think already this project as taught me some important lessons about myself and my tendency towards unfulfilled desire and instant gratification.
So...There's That.
I'd like to start off with what Max got out of it. As of today he knows A, B and C. He knows the number one, the triangle and the color Yellow. He was indifferent about the Blues. He likes to color with Crayons, he really dug those dinosaurs at the Field Museum and 20 mins of exercise happens 20 mins after he wakes up in the morning and continues on for another 8 hours a day!
I've already written about my experiences with the Field Museum, The Triangle, The exercise, the Letters and number so you know where I am at with those.
Let's talk about the Yellow. The Lovely, Lovely Yellow. I have to say that I'm in love with Yellow and all week I've been having some major separation anxiety about the end of yellow. My eye looks for yellow and it's hard to not sound cheesy when I say this...but Yellow really does fill me with joy. It makes me smile. Jack, a dear friend of mine, has been faithfully sending me emails FILLED with lovely yellow images everyday of the week. I wish I had a way to adequately share those with you because they are simply amazing. (In fact, if any of you are interested I'll gladly forward you a couple). Not only were they a lovely daily dose of Yellow, it was nice that a friend was quietly reminding me that I wasn't in this alone.
There were times when wearing Yellow was hard. I've already talked about how it is impossible to simply blend in when wearing yellow but for the most part I think I wore it well. I know I'm gushing but I think this yellow month has changed my life. I highly recommend a daily dose of yellow the way some folks take Vitamin C.
Did we color with Crayons? Oh did we Ever! No great revelations were made with the kid and crayons. It took me awhile to get a series going that I dug with those crayons but I did and I kinda dig it. The End.
Finally,
The Blues and I had a bit of a love hate relationship. I came into this really expecting to LOVE the hell out of the blues. That didn't really happen and I kinda of got sick of the Blues pretty quickly. That is sad because I think the Blues deserved better.
Who I did I listen to? B.B. King, Buddy Guy, Otis Rush, Stevie Ray Vaughn, Little Walter, Johnny Lee Hooker, Bonnie Raitt, Eric Clapton, Mofro, Howlin' Woof, Koko Taylor, Muddy Waters, Albert King, Junior Wells
There were definitely highlights. Like the following two songs that I've danced to again and again in my kitchen :
Koko Taylor (As another blues artist has described her: "This girl ain't playin'!) :
The Father of Chicago Blues:
One final thing of note. There were by necessity some changes made. Max's pajamas didn't always have yellow in them and I wasn't about to go out and buy tons of yellow pj's for one month. Other than his pj's that kid did wear yellow everyday (as did I). I think that I'm going to have to accept that the pajamas might not always meet the color of the month (but certainly will when they can.)
Also, my exploration with yellow is going to end in a few short minutes as I have a palm reading gig tonite and since it's a paid "performance" (and I need to dress dark and gothy) there will be no yellow. Tomorrow, Halloween, is our Free Day this month. I'm sure I'll be giddy with freedom (or missing the yellow?)
Finally, faithful readers, a confession. I broke down and played exactly 6 non-blues songs this month. I'm weak I know but man were they delicious.
Friday, October 30, 2009
Wednesday, October 28, 2009
Slightly Off-Topic
As my project's first month is coming to an end I definitely have things to say, a recap to make and initial thoughts about november to discuss. However, that's not what I want to talk about right now.
You see, although I LOVED turning 30 and I didn't have much of the dread that people associate with turning 30, I have been struggling with the notion of what it means to be a "grown-up".
Technically, I'm grown. I'm 30, I have a husband and a kid. I definitely have put many of my "childish" things away. I'm a bit of a different person socially. I like to go out still but I also really like to come home and get in my bed and read a book. I now know the value of coming home to a bed that's been made. I'm faithful to making homemade meals from scratch (as opposed to a once cherished lifestyle in which a meal consisted of a vicodin, sushi and a big glass of wine). Things definitely changed, mostly for the better? Yes, mostly for the better. Although, I am at times struck with nostalgia for times that have long passed.
There are moments when I make decisions that feel very "grown-up". This year we've decided that we are going to stay home on Halloween. Max is finally old enough to participate and since I missed last years trick or treating due to my ankle injury, I didn't want to miss this year. I felt like we've spent so many years partying in ridiculous costumes that it's o.k. if we let this year slide by with out boozing it up in face paint. So, we've planned to go to a fall fest during the day, we'll have a friend's 6 year old us with in the evening and we will trick or treat, make pizzas with the kids and watch scary movies and drink wine when they are in bed. This to me, sounds lovely.
The other side of being a grown-up is letting go of life choices that may no longer apply to my life today. When I was in my early 20s I had an office job. One that was way ahead of my age. When I was 24 I left that job and chose an art life. Since then I've prided myself on my ability to support myself without working in an office. I've been pretty successful at this until recently. Recently, I can't get a job. Any Job really and our financial woes are totally crushing my spirit (another hard aspect of growing up). I'm still clinging to this idea of having a life/career in the arts but feel like maybe I need to really give in and accept that this may not be in the cards.
But I DO get gigs from time to time (like this Friday wherein I'm doing Palm Readings at a Fancy Pants party in the John Hancock Observatory).
Should I give this art life one final push. Put everything all in and see if I can make it? Or do I give up and go get a "real" job (if I can).
What will become of me? What will become of this project?
What is a "grown-up" anyways?
You see, although I LOVED turning 30 and I didn't have much of the dread that people associate with turning 30, I have been struggling with the notion of what it means to be a "grown-up".
Technically, I'm grown. I'm 30, I have a husband and a kid. I definitely have put many of my "childish" things away. I'm a bit of a different person socially. I like to go out still but I also really like to come home and get in my bed and read a book. I now know the value of coming home to a bed that's been made. I'm faithful to making homemade meals from scratch (as opposed to a once cherished lifestyle in which a meal consisted of a vicodin, sushi and a big glass of wine). Things definitely changed, mostly for the better? Yes, mostly for the better. Although, I am at times struck with nostalgia for times that have long passed.
There are moments when I make decisions that feel very "grown-up". This year we've decided that we are going to stay home on Halloween. Max is finally old enough to participate and since I missed last years trick or treating due to my ankle injury, I didn't want to miss this year. I felt like we've spent so many years partying in ridiculous costumes that it's o.k. if we let this year slide by with out boozing it up in face paint. So, we've planned to go to a fall fest during the day, we'll have a friend's 6 year old us with in the evening and we will trick or treat, make pizzas with the kids and watch scary movies and drink wine when they are in bed. This to me, sounds lovely.
The other side of being a grown-up is letting go of life choices that may no longer apply to my life today. When I was in my early 20s I had an office job. One that was way ahead of my age. When I was 24 I left that job and chose an art life. Since then I've prided myself on my ability to support myself without working in an office. I've been pretty successful at this until recently. Recently, I can't get a job. Any Job really and our financial woes are totally crushing my spirit (another hard aspect of growing up). I'm still clinging to this idea of having a life/career in the arts but feel like maybe I need to really give in and accept that this may not be in the cards.
But I DO get gigs from time to time (like this Friday wherein I'm doing Palm Readings at a Fancy Pants party in the John Hancock Observatory).
Should I give this art life one final push. Put everything all in and see if I can make it? Or do I give up and go get a "real" job (if I can).
What will become of me? What will become of this project?
What is a "grown-up" anyways?
Monday, October 26, 2009
Sunday, October 25, 2009
Wednesday, October 21, 2009
Field Museum!
Perhaps it seems to you that my posts are slowing down and that would be true. Does that mean I'm falling off the wagon so soon? Absolutely not! We are still project-rific over here, wearin yellow everyday, singin the blues. drawin with crayons and working on A, B and C over here! I've also made some major exercise strides and that feels pretty good. And Today? Today we completed our Field Museum commitment for this month.
Max loved the exceptionally exceptional children's area. He was kind of freaked out and intrigued by the life-sized bugs in the Underground Adventure. He LOVED the dinosaurs (but that's not surprising who DOESN"T love dinosaurs?)! He was even interested in the creepy stuffed animal exhibit.
NO ONE was excited about the lame "Pirates" exhibit. Seriously, Lame. The most disappointing museum exhibit EVER (and I've been to a lot of Museum exhibits.)
What did I really like about the museum trip today?
Getting to spend time with my dear friend, K. The exhibits today really just settled into a backdrop as we talked a lot about where we are at and where we want to be. It felt really good to touchbase with him today. It's a rare friendship where we always just "get" each other completely.
I've been feeling a lot of dread lately about the state of my life. It felt good to speak it aloud to someone. To someone who was feeling something similar.
I often say that we can all "only be where we are at". I also think that the universe doesn't make mistakes and if we open ourselves up to the possibility, life will lead us from one thing to the next. One of my favorite books, "Siddhartha" by Herman Hesse stresses the different lives we all can lead in a single lifetime. There can be time for a life of excess and a life of restraint. We get what we need from each life phase to help us along on our journey. I believe that one day I will find my river of peace as Siddhartha did. I've been holding on to these thoughts to get me through the now.
The universe did not make a mistake in K and I planning this visit to the Field Museum. We didn't need to just see some dinosaurs and stand in a Maori Lodge, we also needed some truth and a friend who was willing to listen.
I've said it many times before and now I will say it again. I've got very little to speak of but one thing I have in abundance is some pretty amazing people to call my friends. This project continues to expand my life in unexpected ways.
Sunday, October 18, 2009
b-b-b-B!
Books, Biscuits, Baskets, Bicycle, Buried, Burlesque, Bible, Bricks, Brink, Bracket, Bracelet, Borders, Burps, BAM(!), Bear, Blue, Blueberries, Bringing, Bought, Bliss, Barber, (ro)Bert, Back, Bake, Brownies, Blame, Balloons, Bluebells, Blocks, Boat, Baby, Bach, Bow, Below, Black, Blouse, Blubber, Bowery, Becks, Blithe, Belly, Bed, Better, Bath, Big, Budget, Brother, Beyond, Bank, BOOM (!), Bored, Board, Bejeweled, Bones, Best, Beyonce, Burn, Bluster, Bloom, Blank, Buy, (good)Bye.
Friday, October 16, 2009
Accountability
So.....I am officially half way through my first month. I've worn Yellow everyday, I've listened to the Blues every day (mostly) to the exclusion of all other music, Max knows the Triangle, the number one and the letter A really well (he's still working on B and C), we've been really experimenting with crayons. We haven't gone to the Field museum yet but I'm going to schedule that in the next week or so......
However, I've not been doing so well with my new habit. Some days I exercise 20 mins (or more!) but most days I don't at all. This habit was important to me because I really want to be healthier. The funny this is, I actually like the way I feel after I exercise (rarely during). It really does make me feel good both physically and emotionally. I just have such a hard time squeezing it in or overcoming my laziness.
But no more, for the rest of the month I will not only be exercising my minimum of 20 mins a day, I'm adding a mandatory session of situps, leg raises and pushups to each day. This takes about 10 mins. I'm also going to find days that I will schedule longer exercise activities (ie: sunday there is talk of biking to pulaski/peterson to do a 90 min community yoga class. That'll be like a whopping 3 or 4 hours of physical activity!)
I WILL make myself do this. I'm continuing to write so that I continue to be accountable.
However, I've not been doing so well with my new habit. Some days I exercise 20 mins (or more!) but most days I don't at all. This habit was important to me because I really want to be healthier. The funny this is, I actually like the way I feel after I exercise (rarely during). It really does make me feel good both physically and emotionally. I just have such a hard time squeezing it in or overcoming my laziness.
But no more, for the rest of the month I will not only be exercising my minimum of 20 mins a day, I'm adding a mandatory session of situps, leg raises and pushups to each day. This takes about 10 mins. I'm also going to find days that I will schedule longer exercise activities (ie: sunday there is talk of biking to pulaski/peterson to do a 90 min community yoga class. That'll be like a whopping 3 or 4 hours of physical activity!)
I WILL make myself do this. I'm continuing to write so that I continue to be accountable.
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